Relationship Reality Bites: Rejection

No one wants to be rejected, but it happens all the time. You're trying to change lanes, so you turn on your signal and check your blind spot. There would be enough space for you to slide over, but the car speeds past you leaving you feeling...rejected.  You apply to a job that you are more than qualified for and you even get called in for an interview, but one day you get a letter in the mail that starts with "We regret to inform you...."  You've just been....rejected.  You express your feelings for a guy that you've been dating and the below scenario ensues...

I have come to tell you that you CANNOT let the pain of rejection paralyze you. You must dust yourself off and walk into your destiny. You will eventually change lanes and get to where you headed. You will get a new job that is even better that the one that played with your emotions. And as it pertains to relationships, remember that there are millions of people out there. There just has to be someone out there for you. You can let it happen serendipitously or you can get some algorithms working for you. Check out the TED Talk video by Amy Webb and you'll see what I mean!

Education Tidbits: Save Time And Money With Dual Enrollment Programs

With soaring education costs, it is good to know that there are ways to save money.  Dual enrollment programs around the country afford mostly high school juniors and seniors the opportunity to take college courses that count toward graduation and as college credit. “Hitting two birds with one stone” if I’ve ever heard of it!  Most programs around the country are at no cost to the families, and still others have a waiver for low income students.  In some states, the cost is paid by the parents.  Yet, if looked upon objectively no matter where the cost burden lies, families will still save money and time to boot.  

Since students are working toward completing general studies during their senior year, they enter college as a sophomore.  That is one less year that families would have to pay full tuition of a 4-year institution. Programs like the one in Virginia put students on track toward earning a General Education Certificate by the end of their high school senior year. Upon graduating from high school with their General Education Certificate, students are able to transition to community college as sophomores. Earning an associate’s degree from a community college positions the students for eligibility for Guaranteed Admission at Virginia colleges and universities.

Programs such as dual enrollment, ensure that students will complete their college education early or on time, which strengthens the workforce and in turn the economy.  Check your state department of education website for more information about your state’s local programs.

Fall Fashion Watch: Cableknit Sweaters

Long Sleeve Cableknit Jumper Cardigan Oversized Baggy Batwing Sweater

Buy this perfect sweater here. One day left for the sale price of $19.54!!

A sweater makes the cold temps of fall and winter worth it! THIS sweater is so swoon worthy, I'm having a hard time trying to express my affection for it.  It's everything a sweater should be--notice how long the name is?  It's loose and fitted.  It falls just below the bum and scoops up in the front. It hangs effortlessly on the body with no need for accessories of any kind.  It's a cardigan and a cape. It come in one size fits most, so if you're not comfortable with that I found a plus size version with fur here!

Versatility is paramount when spending your money and this style of sweater translates to the office over a pencil skirt or sheath dress. It can be worn in a more casual way with skinny jeans or leggings or be ultra playful with a bodycon mini dress. It's only around $20, so pick one up online today! You'll thank me!

Today's Soundtrack: "Who's That Lady" by the Isley Brothers meets "I" by Kendrick Lamar

I really wanted to write about this on Tuesday when the news broke about Kedrick Lamar dropping a new album (why do we still refer to them as albums?), but I waited until my Friday music day.  If you haven't heard his new single "I," give it a listen here.  Beware! It is labeled as explicit. 

GQ's Man of the Year Issue 2013 - Kendrick Lamar did NOT let fame water down his brand of authentic hip hop.

I absolutely adore this track. It reminds me of my favorite group, A Tribe Called Quest with a few more expletives, but reminiscent of that golden era all the same.  There's no singing just Kendrick Lamar's unique flow over a masterfully produced track. I was dancing, bobbing, and listening to what he had to say. That combination is hard to find these days in hip hop where you're either dancing or bobbing, but listening will numb your mind. It's going to be wonderful to have "I love myself" looping in my mind. More importantly, the youth will be speaking a positive affirmation over themselves when they repeat the hook! Winning! 

There were some rumblings last year that Kendrick Lamar would "sell out" and lose touch with his authentic style of hip hop he refreshingly creates. The rumblings began because of the ultra-success of Good Kid, M.A.A.D City.  I guess those rumblings are quieted this week. This single is a definite progression, but not stepping too far from his brand of good music rooted in hip hop history.  

If the sample sounds familiar, it's because he used the Isley Brothers' "That Lady" which in recent years has been used for commercials. Everyone knows this track!

Isley Brothers' music has been used in a bunch of hip hop classics. Check them out on one of my favorite sites Who Sampled.

I'm looking forward to checking out Kendrick Lamar's entire album.  The release date has yet to be set.

How to Help Kids Find Their Passion

Amazon

Goodreads

Note: I'm going to clear out some time to read Flow in the coming weeks as well as some of his other books found here.  I am so excited about this I'm doing a happy dance right now! Creativity is almost as important to me as my heartbeat.

We should know our children better than anyone else, but it seems that the craziness of life often gets in the way.  I make it my point to study my child. I want him to avoid wasting his time pursuing things that really don’t suit him.  Let's use sports as an example.  He tried soccer at age four. He loved it the first year, but each season became less and less enjoyable for him. He “retired” from the sport when he was six years old. He was an excellent soccer player with skills and stamina, but he didn’t like it. So, the following spring, he tried lacrosse and loved it. Then in the fall, he found his “flow” with football. He is an overall excellent athlete no matter the sport, but football is where his passions lie.  Had I made him stay with soccer, I would have missed the opportunity to witness his football abilities and joy playing the sport.  He’s even interested in playing football in the spring which means that lacrosse and his $300 dollars’ worth of equipment will take a back seat for now.  He assured me that he'll pick it back up when he's in middle school.


Another area where he is in his flow is while he is drawing and sculpting.  He sits for hours drawing, but will only play a video game for the requisite 15 minutes.  The average attention span is 15 minutes, but when we are in our flow, "time doesn’t exist." What activities does your child do for long periods of time?  Don’t say watch TV! We all are guilty of that one.  There are some other activities in which your child becomes enthralled. Take note. That activity just may be the thing that will make him millions while fulfilled and possibly blessing others.  I’ve posted a TED talk about flow. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi: Flow, The Secret to Happiness. The video is also found here.

I related to the speaker more than I could have ever imagined. When I’m writing, time doesn’t exist. I will sit down to write and the next thing I know it’s 3 hours later. If I don’t write, I miss my characters. I wonder what they’re up to.  Anyway, once you notice your child’s “flow” activity, give them opportunities to hone their skills.  Give them the tools they need to experience this wonderful space. I signed my son up for two art camps this summer, and of course we are in the middle of football season right now. I signed him up for a speed and agility afterschool activity this fall as well. There are always a plethora of art supplies available to him.

I think back to when I was eight years old deciding my future by stating that I wanted to be a pediatrician based on an interview I conducted with my pediatrician. I couldn’t stand the sight of mucus or blood, but I was going to be a doctor. I sat in my room for hours designing clothes and hairstyles, but doctor was my career choice.  I took photographs and won awards for my photography, but doctor it was.  I wrote and illustrated books and won awards for them, but there was no turning back from a declaration I made when I was a mere eight years old.  O, had my parents and I known about flow back then.  I would be a fashion journalist. But, it’s never too late, and the fact that I’ve been through twists and turns with my career, makes me all the better suited to help students make wise decisions about their career track.  Let's study our children, witness when they're in flow, and help them hone those skills. Simple, right?  Help them intermingle the practical with their passions and success is inevitable!

It's Time to "Fall" in Love!

It is amazingly easy to meet new people in the summer. Everyone is traveling, and you can strike up conversation with complete strangers on a plane or in an out-of-town restaurant. But, now that fall is in full swing, the usual routine is solidified once again...or is it? If you are looking to find a sweetie in time for winter snuggling, this is the definitive list just for you.

1. Sports Bars - Have you heard that it is football season? On any given Thursday, Saturday or Sunday, sports bars and grills are filled with men. Take your pick! If you are not an avid football fan, you must know at least a little about the game.  You don't want to be conspicuously clueless, but be willing to learn. This will be a definite ego booster for a man who can be your personal instructor.  If you are genuinely into football, even better. Wear you team's colors proudly and be ready for some cute trash talk.  Don't be too much like one of the guys, but balance your love of the sport with you love of being feminine.  You can do it!

2. Harvest Festivals (Any festivals come to think of it!) - Fall brings all types of festivals, and with the weather becoming more crisp, bad hair days are gone.  Most festivals will bring out the family set, so be meticulous about which ones you chose to find a cutie to flirt with.  Anything with face painting may not be your festival of choice.  "Oktoberfests" and music festivals will usually draw a more mature crowd.  And, never pass up a wine tasting! If you can find a cognac tasting in your area, you will hit pay dirt! 

3. Lunch Break - Now that everyone is back from vacations, you can do a tour of area restaurants during your lunch break.  Pick one or two eateries to try each week with coworkers or solo.  You are guaranteed to meet someone new in no time.

4. Homecoming - Yes, you should attend your homecoming. No, you do not have to lose 100 pounds in two months. Maybe, just maybe, you'll either rekindle an old friendship or meet someone new.

5. Coffee Shops - New flavors, new treats, who knows who you'll meet!  Pumpkin, nutmeg, cinnamon, and all things yummy pop up in coffee shops. You're not the only one who will stop in to get limited time fare. That special someone may just have a taste for a latte the morning you pop in after reading this list.

Get dates and time at kingsdominion.com.

6. Amusement Parks - If you are not the faint at heart, you should try amusement park Halloween transformations.  You’ll be running for your life from chainsaw wielding mad men! You’ll need someone to save you, so keep a lookout for single fellows to the rescue.  The thrill of it all will help you bond with your new acquaintance.  

7. Volunteer - The fall brings about opportunities to pack food trucks, sort canned goods from food drives, and other altruistic endeavors leading up to the holidays.  Strong arms and caring hearts of available men will be involved. You can help feed the hungry while satisfying your own man hunger!

There are many more places to go and meet new people, but these seven will be a good start.  The key is to stay on the move. Don't slump back in the house because the days are getting shorter and colder.  Take advantage of the events and activities unique to this time of year.  By this winter, you'll be cozied up by the fire with your new sweetie thinking about how wonderful a fall you had. Will you plan a summer wedding?

Fall Fashion Watch: Dresses

Find this look at Forever 21+

Find this look at Lane Bryant 

This one's for my "fluffly" and "curvy" girls!


Legs, legs, legs!! Fall is the perfect time to put those legs on display. Don't put those razors away quite yet, Ladies!  I am a sucker for a great dress. The versatility of a well cut dress lends to its appeal.  

The Forever 21+ Abstract Watercolor Print Dress has me written all over it. The colors pop and go against the autumn earth tone grain. I love how they paired this body con dress with a burgundy leather jacket. For day, you can wear this dress with a black blazer and classic pair of pumps.  At night, go wild with a neon green or pink jacket and some strappy pumps.  The possibilities are endless with this dress. Every time I look at it, I see another way I could spice it up. A belt around a white oxford blouse and a statement necklace would be pure cuteness.  How about a moto jacket and some rugged Frye boots like the ones found here to keep them guessing?

Lane Bryant's Leopard A-line Dress is the perfect piece to transition from end of summer to fall to winter.  Where it now as is. As it gets chillier, throw on a black leather jacket or a chunky cardigan like the one here. For more fun jazz it up with a POC. A pashmina in a color that compliments your complexion would be ideal. My colors would be turquoise or watermelon. I found that out by reading The Color of Style by David Zyla. The peeptoe mule booties are perfect with this dress and as the temps drop, a great riding boot or heeled boot in any color except grey would be a knockout!  Have fun with opaque stockings with those boots or a suede shoe of the same color. So much can be done with this piece!

And Ladies, if you need help finding wide calf boots, drop me a note. I got a nice long list for you!

Today's Soundtrack: Santana ft. Miguel "Indy"

This song takes me places that I really need to go. Miguel was quoted as wanting people to "feel" his music. This collaboration between Santana and him truly conjures up feelings of love, lust, and desire.  If you're sad, this song gives you hope that someone is praying for you. If you are happy, the ethereal airiness of the music seems to take you higher.  Miguel is a wonderful artist who I can't wait to hear more from in the coming months. He doesn't have any tour dates posted at this time, but I will be sure to keep checking. I really want to experience him live. And, what can I say about how Santana makes his guitar speak? This song is like a duet with Miguel and Santana's guitar balancing each other effortlessly.  After Santana's solo, just listen how he plays off of Miguel's vocals. Ahhh...enjoy this short song of ecstasy that will make you hit repeat.

Bun + Burger + Cheese = Perfection!

As I struggle to lose 5 pounds to reach my next weight loss goal, I am confronted with another "national whatever day."  This one is truly one I can sink my teeth into! I didn't even know it existed, but now that I do, I have to make a choice. Today is National Cheeseburger Day! Should I go to my favorite burger spots or grill up my own creation?

Art By Brock Davis -- You can buy it here.

If I go out to celebrate this most wonderfully designed day, I have several options that all suit my fancy.

Burger Works! Ahhh, just thinking about their burgers makes me smile. There is something about the turkey burger sitting on that perfectly soft egg bun that makes me want to dance. I always get the white cheddar, sauteed mushrooms, lettuce, tomato, and jalapenos. Their pesto mayo is something of an experience that makes me want to leave now and grab a burger. 

I've never had this beast of a burger, but Burger Works is more than happy to oblige anyone who wants a hearty meal!

Good ole Five Guys always delivers some yummy goodness! (mouth's watering) I never ruin my appetite by munching on peanuts. I want to be able to eat my whole double and fries without hindrance!  Topped with mayo, lettuce, tomatoes, grilled mushrooms, ketchup, onions, and jalapeno peppers, my burger is a masterpiece.  What's more is that I could walk to Five Guys right now because of all of their convenient locations. Shall I?

I wonder what a Five Guys' burger would taste like with everything checked??

My own creation would be mighty tasty as well. For the ease of it, I usually get Jenni-O frozen unseasoned turkey patties.  I sprinkle a little seasoned salt along with black and red pepper on one side.  They grill up quickly so I use the one turn rule. I cook on one side for about 15 minutes, flip, and cook for about 5-8 more minutes. Cook times will vary by grill type and fire level.  I love sesame seed topped butter buns. Cheddar is my cheese of choice, but muenster cheese has made its way on my burgers at times to change it up.  I keep it simple at home by just adding some freshly sliced tomatoes, ketchup and mayo. At times, I add a handful of bagged romaine salad. 

  One of my favorite sights: my grill ablaze!! Photo credit: Amanda Gia

Me when it's time to cookout...

Whatever I decide, a cheeseburger will be on the menu tonight!! Enjoy!

  

Cloudy Days

I woke up super early this morning with nothing to do. It felt great. All of my articles for the week were written. I'm pausing the work on my book this weekend to allow my creative juices to replenish.  I've posted an ad for my car for sale on Craigslist. I have an action plan to get my house market ready that can be done on Sunday afternoon. So what do I do on this lazy morning? I took to Tumblr and Pinterest to intake images that will amuse and ignite. I needed that time to get lost in pictures and gifs. I needed that time to just do nothing which is actually doing something.  Now I'm ready to make my weekly productivity list aka "to do list" and ravish at each check mark I'm able to make as another week flies by.

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/styledbygia/
Tumblr: styledbygia.tumblr.com and coolboyfashionideas.tumblr.com  <<<Great images to go with my article available for purchases on Constant Content (look at the window on the top left of this page) entitled Little Boy, Big Style

Monthly "Ponderable" Thought

So, if I what I give freely to others will be given back to me in greater measure, how come I'm not inundated with lots of hugs?

*Smiles*
Make your life great by helping others make theirs great!

Experimenting

This is my very first "public" painting. I have painted for many years, but kept my works private...hidden. I'm experimenting with different canvasses and paints. This is water color on cotton canvas. I used a partly Fauvist approach to some of my color choices and overly dramatized facial features. Kees van Dongen is my inspiration. See more of his works here (my favorite The Corn Poppy 1919) and here.

I sketched in pencil on the canvas before layering the watercolors on the rough surface.  It was very interesting how the watercolor interacted with the cotton.  Some colors worked better than others. Blue (turtleneck) and gray (background) were smooth going on, while  brown was tough to apply evenly.  I can't wait to try out some other techniques...just need to find the time!

Fall Fashion Watch: The Robe Coat

How to Wear the Robe Coat Right

One of the trends in outerwear this fall is the robe coat, but wearing it without the right accompaniments will make for a bulky, unappealing look. A slouchy wide leg pant may be too overwhelming for some body types with this robust coat. But skinny jeans paired with a long cow-neck sweater and some peeptoe booties under a cinched-in robe coat is definitely a chic look.  Do you want to take your look from ordinary to luxe? A black robe coat that hides a neon bodycon dress, black tights, and a black platform pump will turn heads. Actress Naomi Harris got it right with a Burberry brocade robe coat over a silky mid-length dress and a POC with velvet open toe pumps seen here covered by bloggers Tom & Lorenzo.  How else would you wear a robe coat…the right way?

Creativity

In honor of back to school, I'm posting a helpful paper I completed a couple of years ago on creativity.  I hope it sparks your creativity. It may even be helpful information for your own paper.  Have a great year and feed your imagination!

Psychoanalytic Theories of Creativity & Genius
by Amanda Gia
MLA:  Johnson, Amanda Gia. "Psychoanalytic Theories of Creativity & Genius."  Amanda Gia. Blogspot.com, 4 Sept. 2014. Web. Access Date.

An epiphanic thought came to mind after reading Carlisle Bergquist's article:  The act of discovering the source of creativity is a creative process within itself.  Which leaves one to wonder, if the progenitors of the three branches of psychology, Freud, B. F. Skinner, Rogers and others, would have attempted to uncover their source of creativity, would they have found the answer?  They would have been their own best subjects. They would have known what happened immediately prior to an idea of greatness, what encounters sparked curiosity, and what emotional state they were experiencing when inspiration hit.  Instead, they looked to the tenants of psychology to define creativity.

Psychoanalysis was too primal in its interpretation. Freud even acknowledged that psychoanalysis was not the solution to “elucidating the nature of the artistic gift” in his Autobiographic Study (qtd. in Bergquist). There had to have been a better explanation for the creative process than impulses and urges.  If all of the creative people in this world were unhappy and unfulfilled, this world would be in an abysmal state.  Behavioristic psychology is built on what is observable, and the source of creativity is definitely not observable. The behavioral processes and the ultimate products of creativity were studied, yet the source was still unidentifiable since it was an unquantifiable enigma.  Lastly, the humanistic approach to understanding creativity drew near to the source because it clearly described the creative process, integrating aspects of both psychoanalytic (i.e., primary processes) and behavioristic (i.e., conditioning and positive reinforcement) in addition to declaring that creativity is what makes one human.  Humanistic psychology best describes Albert Einstein’s creative process, yet still lacks to uncover the source.   

Einstein’s “driving need to understand the logic of nature, tied to a breathtaking creativity and a fierce intellectual independence” were the catalysts for his work (Smolin 56).  His “driving need” fueled his creativity and his creativity coupled with his intellect and hard work changed society.  His process can be clearly observed through the humanistic integrated creativity lens.  Yet, he had visions or “happy thoughts” while at his job at the patent office (Gribbin 39).   Where did these visions originate? Was it his childhood imagination resurfacing at a time when he could infuse his vast knowledge to postulate and test theories of relativity? Or, was he just sleepy causing his brain to wonder which precipitated broad thinking (Diduch 9)? The source is still a mystery.  Einstein’s ability to think on dual planes of thought by connecting a happy thought and the laws of physics can be characterized as “bisociation” as coined by Arthur Koestler in his 1964 book The Art of Creation (qtd. in Bergquist). Ainsworth-Land’s third order humanistic view best describes his creative process insomuch he was in constant harmony with physics.  “Insightful solutions to problems often happen when people use knowledge that they did not realize would be valuable when they learn it” (Markman 52).  As proposed by Smolin in “Why No ‘New Einstein’?” encouragement and funding should be given to scientists who are “independent thinkers” with “diverse points of view” who are committed to solving the untrendy problems “to ensure the progress of science is not stalled” (56-57). 

The same sentiment should be expressed in the discovery of the source of creativity.  Although the three branches of psychology describe the process, the origins of creativity in the human mind or, even in the human genome, still need to be unlocked.  “The concepts, attitudes, and procedures employed are probably at fault and in need of being transcended in a fresh approach” (Ghiselin 3).  This fresh approach should be one that studies the characteristics, habits, environmental factors, genealogy, nutrition, and spiritual life of all who are creative, no matter what they create. Whether the arts or psychology, the light bulb pops up over them all.  Had the psychologists not precluded themselves from their own studies, it is quite possible that we would know what powers that light bulb.

Works Cited
Bergquist, Carlisle. “A Comparative View of Creativity Theories: Psychoanalystic, Behavioristic,   
    and Humanistic.” Vantage Quest for Creativity and Personal Transformation (1999-2000).  Web. 
    14 May 2012. <http:// www. vantagequest.org/ trees/comparative.htm>
Diduch, Mary. “Four secrets of creativity: to get your mental engine humming ignore conventional 
    advice.”  Psychology Today (2012): 9. Web. 18 May 2012.  <http.// go.galegroup.com>
Ghiselin, Brewster, ed. Introduction. The Creative Process: Reflections on Invention in
    the Arts and Sciences. 1952. California: University of California Press; London: University of 
    California, LTD, 1985. Print.
Gribbin, John, and Mary Gribbin. Einstein in 90 Minutes. London: Constable and Company Limited, 
    1997. Print.
Markman, Art.  “Get smart: how to bulk up your creativity muscle.” Psychology Today (2012: 52) 
    Web. 18 May 2012. <http.//go.galegroup.com>
Smolin, Lee. “Why No ‘New Einstein’?”  Physics Today (2005): 56-57. Print.